constipated square-dancing

I wonder what that would be like? People dancing when they have to poo but can't. Or maybe they would like it because it would loosen up some stuff in there. i think I'll make that a porn idea. Try this one in the video store "CONSTIPATED SQUARE-DANCING AMPUTEE MIDGETS 5".  You see, with such a title people with think there have been four other volumes, and look for them. A few mentions here and there to keep the myth alive about the other four and the 5th copy will sell like naked snowroaches. BOOM! Million dollar idea right there. Watching Macgyver as I type this. Yes I'm old enough to remember when it came on tv originally. What if Macgyver had gone into porn? He would start out as a pizza guy with no pants, and end up making a dildo and a french tickler out of saran wrap and carpet padding. That gives ME and idea. HONEY! I was kidding of course. My woman is into hitting me with a garden hose while I watch dukes of hazzard and spitting on my forehead and throwing mice into a bowl of jello with grass clippings sprinkled generously about my ears while the dog eats cap'n crunch from my batman jar, BUT, she's not into anything that kinky.

So I hear on the radio that there is an Ethiopian restaurant hear in Yoo-ston. (or Houston to be technical). I'm serious. An Ethiopian reastaurant. Not only do they now have enough food apparently , they have enough to export.  And what would that dining experience be like exactly? Does the waiter set you down in  a box of sand and put flies on your face? You get to watch people in blue helmets pass out food and Sally Struthers cries in front of a camera on your behalf?

You ever try to impress the animals while having sex? You know what I mean, you are engaged to booty wooty and there are animals present, you lokk around and they are either watching you or ignoring you, but either way you try to impress them, you know? Not like American Psycho shit but I mean like, you kinda have an audiance and as such you try to do shit a little extra since they're watching you.

ANAL RAGE

So then I think to myself, mayonaise pallet on steroids lobster crotch so my dog had decided that instead of shitting on the carpet, because he knows not to do that, he will shit in the cat's litter box. Cute huh?


If I were to become a D.J. I would name myself "D.J. Constipate"

How do porcupines mate anyway?



spankfallicy,

meyatt